What to do when it is 105 degrees in the shade with 100% humidity

• Weep mercifully
• Dive 10 meters into a well
• Try to take a bath, then sweat immediately after
• Ride a bicycle really fast to create a breeze
• Take a nap and wake up thinking you are in hell
• Sit in front of a fan…no wait, there’s no electricity
• Drink warm beer until the heat becomes fuzzy
• Hike 45 minutes to the river, dive in, then hike 45 minutes back to town feeling worse than when you started
• Run into the shady jungle and be attacked mercilessly by mosquitoes
• Stand in the sun ten minutes, then go back into the shade and think, “It’s really cool here”
• Take a bus three hours to where the climate is cooler
• Try and ignore the sticky, sweaty, slimy, stinky sensations and continue on with life
• Talk to friends and neighbors and agree “Hace calor, ¿verdad?”
• Commit “heaticide” (the act of suicide due to heat exhaustion)
• Change clothes every 5 minutes; or walk around naked like a seven-year old
• Eat a bunch of chili, then pretend it helps you cool down
• Envy the hell out of the locals that aren’t from a northern US state
• Pretend that you are in a “Twilight Zone” where the earth is falling into the sun
• Read a book about Antarctic exploration
• Stop whining and be a man